four faces of artistic imperative


     I’ve been pretty lax on the blogging front lately.  For those of you who may have missed me, I apologize.  I’ve been processing a lot.  Coming to terms with myself and who I really am, who I’ve always been really.  The problem is, I fight everything.  I’m a very high-maintenance person and I am very resistant to incorporating new things into my life because there’s already too much stuff swirling around in my head at any given moment.  Most of the time I just long for a reset back to simplicity.  The big ol’ eraser across the messy, messy chalkboard that is my brain.  But that ain’t gonna happen.  I’m an awkward patchwork resulting from an imperfect, dirty little life and I just need to make due with what I have and accept what I cannot change.  One of those things that I cannot change is the fact that I’m an artist.

     Not just that I have artistic ability and an aesthetic eye but an actual imperative to be an artist.  This is something that I’ve been foolishly fighting against lately and I’ve been losing.  I guess that’s one of the ways you can be sure about something.  It certainly has given me some clarity and confidence in what I need to do with my spare time.  I need to try to be the best artist I can be, to use the time and resources I have available to learn and improve, and to hang on to my dream wherever it may lead.  I may wax and wane in my pursuit but I will never give it up.  I can’t give it up.  This is what I must do.

     Anyway, enough of all of this heartfelt declaration of purpose.  On to the art!  What you see above is the self-portrait I threatened to do using the technique I learned with accidental Stripe.  Since I ended up with four different versions even before I scanned anything I decided to get my Warhol on and block them all together with different color schemes.  I think I captured the sadness, frustration and anger I’ve been going through lately.

     That’s it for now.  I hope to get my butt a little more in gear in coming months and share whatever I can whenever I can.  Thanks for stopping by.