mohawks and hangovers


     Here’s my latest.  Kinda got a head dress/mohawk thing going on.  Total accident.  I just went with the flow, as I’m am wont to do.

     On the good news front, I went ahead and asked for yesterday off from work so I’m currently enjoying a three day weekend (and nursing a bit of a hangover :P ).  Nice break from the six day work weeks of late.  Hope you all are having a perfectly cromulent weekend.

mangina vs. cockasaurus, 2 of 2

(ADULT CONTENT BELOW)

     If you haven’t already, head over to Mr. Gable’s Reality and drink deeply the literary elixir that is Mangina vs Cockasaurus.  All done?  Pretty awesome, eh?  I thought so too.  Stacia and I tossed a joke title at him on a lark and he cranks out an instant gem of a movie pitch!  That’s what’s called “The Gable Way” and don’t you fucking forget it.

     Recently, when Gable casually suggested I do the poster art for the movie, I found it more than a little intriguing.  I mean, I’ve never been bashful about drawing vaginas and cocks in my artwork and Gable’s movie pitch had so much imagination that coming up with something to draw was quite easy.  While I didn’t end up drawing an actual movie poster per se, I did come up with a couple of scenes from the movie pitch featuring our lovable hero and our dastardly villain.  First up, Mangina:

     This is from early in the final battle when they’re beating each other off up with various improvised weapons and objects.  I’m much happier with this version of Mangina.  While I got the disfigured look down with yesterday’s first draft I thought he ended up looking a little wimpy and Mangina is supposed to be super strong.  I beefed him up in this version.  Much better, I think.  Plus the car door looks like the door off of the old Geo Metro I used to drive.

     Cockasaurus gave me trouble at first but then I stopped thinking so hard and just drew a huge cock, as I am wont to do:

     This is Cockasaurus firing that fateful shot that brought Mangina crashing to the ground, foiling his attempt at an aerial escape and almost spelling the end of Mangina.  I’m pretty tickled with this.  Once I decided to go Full Moon with the “costume” and “special effects” it really worked well.  Gary Busey could easily play the part of Cockasaurus, am I right?

     Well, this has been both gobs of fun and quite interesting.  I surprised myself that I was able to think of an idea or two and reproduce them in a fairly accurate fashion to what I had in my head.  Kind of a minor, personal breakthrough of sorts.  Anyway, I hope this was as fun for you as it was for me.  VAGINAS AND COCKS RULE!!

mangina vs. cockasaurus, 1 of 2


(ADULT CONTENT BELOW)

     Here’s my first draft of Mangina.  I drew him “street vigilante” style, with his spiked club, ready to brutally murder any and all criminals that cross his path:


     Cockasaurus proved to be more difficult for some reason.  What follows is not so much a first draft as a sort of brainstorming of what the character should look like:


     After I finished these first two attempts it dawned on me what I needed to do.  I realized I was thinking way too hard about this.  I remembered the final showdown in the junkyard and it suddenly all fell into place.  Tune in tomorrow for the exciting conclusion to my Gable-inspired drawing adventure!

lennon fire and overtime


     The question this image raises in my mind is this:  If you set John Lennon on fire how long would he burn?  I dunno, folks, that’s just the way my mind is working right now.

     I actually sat my ass down today and done did me some art.  Got me a cheapo, slanted drawing board type thing off the Ebay and I think it helps with the ol’ neck strain.  Also got my first work completed for the Octoberween-Palooza-Ganza!  I’m actually surprised my spirits are as good as they are considering my place of employment is working Saturdays all fucking month with threats of Sundays if they don’t get enough volunteers.  It’s a goddamned, motherfucking pleasure living in a Right To Work state.  Oh well, we need the cash.

     Well, I’ll sign off now.  My postings might be a bit sporadic this month, considering, so bear with me.

distraction procrastination and banneritis


     Bear with me, folks, as I get my momentum back.  Here’s a sketchy, facey… thing that I drew a little while ago.  I hope it passes for content.  Anyway, I’ve been very lazy and easily distracted of late.  No sooner did I get over the flu, when I’ve been stricken with Procrastination Syndrome and a recurring case of Banneritis, where I get obsessed with making banners.  I’m not even very good at making banners but when the mood hits me I just can’t help myself.

     I was first infected last summer when I helped Stacia, over at She Blogged By Night, make her banners for the Shatnerthon.  That was about 20 million pounds of fun in a 5 pound bag, lemme tell ya!  We only made a total of four or five banners to promote the event but I had a ball doing it!  Not only that, but it was what got me interested in blogging in the first place.

     Anyhoo, Mr. Gable has been my latest banner victim.  I ran this one by him before I decided to post it so it’s all good.  Head on over and get your dose of Reality right damn now!


     This is the first step in preparations for sprucing up my Links page.  If you have a banner for your site (or would like to be my next victim), please let me know.

lazy bitch


     I don’t know, man.  I just couldn’t finish this one.  I am one big, lazy bitch right now.  I ain’t fucking finishing this.  This is it.  It’s done.  In fact, I’m sick of looking at it.  If you donate a couple bucks for shipping I’ll send this bitch to you!  Normally, I’d send it for the free but we are strapped right now and every penny counts.

     Aaaaanyway, I think what happened is that I started on this before I got sick.  It was going to be a companion piece to breakthrough.  Breakthrough was started with marker and finished with watercolor.  Lazy Bitch Skull here was started with watercolor and I tried to finish it with marker but then I found myself sitting on the the toilet, hugging a trash can.  I think the virus killed what little inspiration I had for this piece and then I spent 48 hours purging all the dead inspiration out of my system.  No wonder it smelled so bad.

      Okay, I’m surprised I was motivated enough to get this far.  I’m off to spend some quality time with my Fleshlights.

stomach flu


     No this isn’t my latest style, it’s what I’ve been going through in the past 48 hours.  Just when I thought I was going to make it through all of the holidays without catching something, I end up with the worst stomach flu I’ve had in years.  I’ll spare you the details by just saying that I’m surprised I still have any internal organs left.

     The above image was actually drawn years ago during (you guessed it) the Sharpie craze.  If there’s one thing that continues to surface throughout the craze, it’s good ol’ fashioned vomiting.  Except, in my case, there were no midgets pointing at me.  Well, I better get some rest and you all be careful, this shit is apparently contagious for a full 2 weeks after you’ve recovered.

may you have a banner year!


     By request, I have made some banners to ring in the new year!  Feel free to yoink these and display them proudly in your sidebar as a symbol of your questionable taste in art.  If you have a banner you’d like to throw my way just let me know and I’ll include it on my links page, which could definitely use some sprucing up.

     Oh my dear, 2011.  May you not suck big, hairy donkey dicks.

looooving me is easy ’cause I’m beautiful!


     This is the only honest to goodness, actually attempting a photographic likeness, self-portrait I have ever done.  This was completed when I was 19 years old.  Early college, when I was all ambitious, arrogant and very serious about myself.  At the time I was all like, “I’m gonna draw myself using two mirrors, man!  That way what I draw will be an actual likeness of myself and not just a mirror image!”  And so I did.  I used two mirrors, concentrated very hard, narcissistically paid special attention to my eyes and pursed lips and, in the end, screwed the whole thing up by making the distance from the tip of my nose to my chin noticeably shorter than it actually is.  Eh, whatcha gonna do.  I was young, dumb and fulla cum.  The odds of me not screwing this up were pretty slim to begin with.

     Have a good new year.  I plan to get drunk and burn shit.